This is a fitting topic for me at the moment, as I am looking for a job, and in so doing, I am constantly faced with the question of where to draw the line between dangerous compromise and wise practical decision. As I mull this over, I think a lot about the idea of work in our culture. There seem to be a few rather distinct perspectives on the matter, but by and large I think that people see “work” as a rather narrow band of activity that is basically defined as the labor that is given in exchange for income. This income may take the form of direct necessities, such as room, board, or health care, or it may take the form of currency that can then be used to procure such necessities, as well as luxuries like nice clothes and japanese eggplant and home theater systems with surround sound. In any case, I think most people see “work” as what they do to make money, and I am beginning to realize that I define the word a bit differently, which leads to some complications when discussing the matter at parties.

Now, I bet you think you know what I’m going to say next. I bet you think this paragraph is going to be all about “work” as vocation. About searching for my calling. You know - work that makes an impact and makes me feel so happy to be alive that I wake up at dawn without an alarm clock (or maybe with an alarm clock that releases essence of bergamot into the air for half an hour and then drops a pebble onto a chime that is floating in a bowl of lilies that is sitting on a bamboo mat that is aligned with the eastern wall) and recite a passage from the Bhagavad-Gita and do yoga in the garden with my cats. I want to be clear before we go any further that I understand quite well that everybody wants to do work that they consider enjoyable and rewarding, that a “balanced life” can be attained in as many ways as there are people to do the balancing, and that it is perfectly reasonable to want to put in your time from 9-5, M-F, 40-odd weeks a year, bring home a paycheck, and spend the rest of your time and the surplus of your income figuring out how to do a little good and have a little fun.

I understand this, but I still feel compelled, in my own quest for balance, to approach the matter from a different angle. The way I see it, we each have a completely unique perspective on the world, and as a result of that perspective, we develop a unique conglomerate of interests, and as a result of that conglomerate, we are drawn to certain activities for which, by virtue of our unique perspective, we have the potential to contribute something new. Insight, in my opinion, is nothing more (and nothing less) than finding connections between previously disconnected things, and such connections usually happen in the minds and lives of people who, through interest or design or accident of history, find themselves drawn to more than one thing at once. Work, then, is the art of learning to pay attention to when and where and who we are, and then doing whatever presents itself.

That may sound like nonsense, or it may seem like I snuck my way back to the idea of work as calling after all, but with some jokes thrown in to shake you off the trail. That is partly true. I do think, as I said above, that we are each drawn to certain work for good reason, and we should listen to ourselves to figure that out. I think there are a lot of connotations with words like calling and vocation, however, and a lot of opportunity for guilt and pressure and general hubbub of a negative variety. I think that, if people do what they do naturally, they will tend to contribute something to society. Looking for something to contribute, however, is generally only confusing, because all sorts of value judgements get thrown in the mix and our vision becomes muddled. This is why I prefer to see it not as looking for the thing to do, but rather as just doing what is naturally in front of me. Corny as it sounds, work, to me, is synonymous with finding the meaning of life.

So to answer the question a bit more directly, I think it makes sense to do a job that I don’t enjoy if I can clearly see how it is a part of my larger vision of “work” - if I am learning a skill, or researching an idea, or making money to survive. Such jobs should be left behind, however, if they take too much energy, or if their connection to the larger picture is unclear. “Jumping ship” is a perfect metaphor, because ships are a good way of describing what I think jobs should be - vessels that lead me from one island to the next, my eye always scanning the horizon. Work, on the other hand, is more than just my jobs. Work is the, um… wind! Work is the wind that speeds the ships on their way. And now this metaphor is over.

So why call it work, you may ask? To be honest, I think it’s because part of me is saddened by the image of work that we have in our culture. Work is a burden. It’s that thing we are forced to do in order to be able to do other things we like. As much as I understand the rationale behind this, and as much as I believe, as I said above, that it can theoretically be done well, I think that most of the time it is unfortunately done rather poorly, and giving “work” a more central position in my own life is my way of trying to do better. Aspirations aside, I think the real goal of most modern Americans is to work enough so that they establish a strong enough safety net to enable them to spend the time when they aren’t at work doing something other than worrying about dying. That might sound like a rather bleak way to describe it, but think about it: it’s hard to enjoy yourself at a backyard bbq or a baseball game or while reading a good book in the bathtub if, in the back of your mind, you’re constantly wondering if you have enough food or if that funny bump on your leg might need to be looked at or if you are going to be able to make the rent next month.

The trouble with this approach is: the safety net will never be strong enough. Life grows more complex, new fears crop up at every corner, each time the net gets bigger we climb the ladder a little higher. If we think the goal is building a better net, we will constantly be distracted from the view, and life becomes more and more like a Protestant promise of happiness in the afterlife (in this case, retirement) in exchange for suffering in the here and now. That is an extreme portrayal of the situation, and perhaps I’m still just a starry-eyed youngun who will one day learn the ways of the world, but I think the only sane solution is to stop being afraid to be alive.

And if that’s the case, we’d better get to work. ;)